2020. The Glass is Half Full?

We all know that 2020 was just the absolute the worst. There were times when I thought the only good thing about the year were all the great memes. Seriously, there were some good ones, and at least it was something to keep us laughing.

But the other day a friend of mine challenged me to go through the pictures on my phone to relive everything that was 2020. Thanks Shannon, it inspired this glass is half full post. 2020 wasn’t ALL that bad. Sure, there was some pretty rough parts and trying to see the good was almost impossible. But if you look hard enough, the sunshine does surface, and I found mine.

So I went through my phone, revisited my social posts and am going to share my year-long journey with you – the good, the bad, and the damn that sucked.

Before I get started, it’s worth noting that as I went through my phone, I realized how many pictures of my dogs I have. It’s ridiculous. Are you curious? Take a guess at how many photos I have of them in 2020 by leaving a comment below. I’ll respond with the answer. :)

So here is my 2020 year in review.

January: it’s 2020 baby!

January was a pretty good month; we hadn’t even heard of COVID. Aaahhh the glory days. I got to see our families and friends in Ohio over the holidays. I went snowboarding in Keystone with my brand-new board, and it was a blast. It was my husband’s birthday and we went to a 3-day Twiddle show (my favorite band), in Frisco, VIP style and we got to meet the band. Can we go back to this month? Although this was also a month where I went to ER with some weird head pain that caused me to need a spinal tap. Fortunately, everything was ok.

February: things are still normal

February was still grooving. I got to see some incredible golden hours at my home (video below). I was able to watch my 5-year-old niece & 4-year-old nephew playing basketball. My niece pushed her own team mate down to get the ball. Ha. I played with a ton of puppies at the animal shelter I volunteer at. We had good friends in town and toured the Garden of the Gods in Colorado Springs - just beautiful - and we all got to see an Oysterhead concert. It was pretty epic, although we all got super sick afterwards. Pretty sure we had COVID in February.  

March: what’s this COVID thing going on?

Here’s where it all starts to go south. COVID-19 started becoming a real thing. Quarantine began and my husband and I stopped going anywhere with people. We couldn’t find Lysol or TP (this is still funny to think about) and the wellness company I worked for (and loved) started the slow decline. On some positive notes, I got to see a dog who came into the animal shelter looking like skin and bones gain weight and find his forever home. On International Women’s Day, a few of my favorite men acknowledged some incredible women and I was lucky enough to have been included with them. Quite an honor. I got back into yoga, discovering Yoga with Adriane, and started walking 5-miles every day. Not a terrible month.  

April: the sky is falling

The ‘world is crumbling’ trend certainly continued in April. I was officially placed on furlough, which was shocking and scary, especially since I still wasn’t going anywhere or seeing anyone for venting and/or laughing sessions. Although it didn’t take too long to realize having time off from work was pretty amazing. I started making masks, which opened up a new creative side. I went for long drives through the mountains of Colorado, put on some good tunes, packed a lunch and drove, enjoying the views. I also I started having zoom calls with friends and family back home, which was so great as I don’t get to see their faces very often.

May: the upswing

Still on furlough, I really began enjoying not working but also started hating that I couldn’t hang out in public settings. So, I began my garden, getting the seeds started, configuring my garden space, and built protection from the bipolar weather in Colorado. I finally put together my wedding album – 8 years later. I began cooking new dinners, like homemade pasta! So good. I celebrated my 40-something birthday and my hubby made me an apple pie from scratch. I made my first dandelion salve and started dehydrating foods for storage. I also taught myself how to play the harmonica, but never really got good.

June: nervousness

With the beautiful first days of summer in 2020 came the uneasiness. It was official – I was being laid off and my company was closing. My dream job was over after only 1-year. I had to start looking for jobs and preparing for interviews. This process is just the worst. You feel me, right? Getting life together during a pandemic with record high unemployment rates causes some stress. So, I took some mental breaks and went camping a few times in secluded areas of Colorado, which is therapeutic for me. I continued my walks and yoga daily, and it was during this time that I also began seriously thinking about starting this blog, thinking about themes, names, how to set up, and what to write about. I also had the incredible pleasure of watching my little cousin, Megan, get married through a virtual setting. It was a lovely substitute for not being able to be there in person.

July: making it happen

This was a month of trying to focus on great things. I went through some professional training to pump up my skills, while still applying to a dozen companies every week (sigh). I continued cooking new things and did a 7-day dinner challenge, cooking recipes from the Thug Kitchen cookbook (highly recommended by the way) and sharing on social. I did more van camping and went on picnics in unchartered locations with my hubby by a lake. The garden continued to kick ass and I got to pick some homegrown goodies. I even had a grasshopper friend who lived in one of my daisies for a few months. Most memorable, I had my first socially distant friends get together in a park. Tiff and Amanda, that was a good day. 

August: new beginnings

August felt like a month to turn life around. I finalized every detail for this blog – the designs, content topics, built the website, photographed recipes and other topics and my incredibly talented friend, Tyler, created The Sunshine Hustle logo. I loved it immediately. All the development for this site was a blast and made me feel like I really accomplished something. This made me feel good. I also accepted a job that allowed me to work from home, safe and sound and put an end to the soul sucking job searching process. Things were getting better.

September: unusual anxieties

September was a very weird month for me. It had now been a month of being back to work after the indulgence of 4 months off to enjoy life. Everything should have quickly returned to normal, but for some reason, it didn’t. I don’t know what it was, but I began to suffer sever anxieties. I began feeling uneasy about everything. With work, I felt like I was doing a terrible job at everything. With everyday existence, I lost that time to focus on me, my relationship, this blog and trying to integrate friends and family in a virtual capacity. Nothing felt right. I cried a lot, and I felt like I was falling into a deep hole. This was certainly a low point, but I continued trying to make time for the things I love like the garden, fall hiking and pumpkin spice creamer.

October: time to deal, I need help

I decided to talk to someone about my unmanageable anxieties because they got really bad. This was hard for me. I’m the “herbal” remedy type of person but recognized that nothing was working, and I needed help. So, I decided to ask for help and got it. This is something I can’t stress enough to anyone else dealing with mental health. Meet with your doctor, ask for help, and talk with someone. Another thing that helped me during this time was being outdoors. I went on as many secluded hikes as I could to be alone to think through my thoughts. Between COVID, work, family stresses, the election, world negativity, and so many other anxieties, I couldn’t handle.

November: I got this

November began the upturn on reality. I found my rhythm at work, anxieties were reduced, or at least managed, and I began seeing the sunshine through the dark. I kept walking, working out, and had an incredible Thanksgiving. I made a ton of great food and even a pumpkin pie entirely from scratch. I played around with making more homemade salves and lotions and expanded my herbal knowledge.

December: healing & reflecting

December started with the passing of a childhood friend. Although I hadn’t seen this person in quite some time, it still hurt and my heart ached for his family. Life can be so unfair sometimes. But here we are - so I’m reflecting and remembering an entire year. I realized this month that yes, the year was pretty much horrible and we all missed out on a lot of things. But looking back as I write this now, there were some definite highlights with friends, family, husband, and myself. I was lucky this year and I realized through this exercise that there are good moments when it feels so dark. You have to find them, recognize them, and do your best to focus on them.

I’m looking forward to the year ahead and plan to recognize the little moments worth remembering. I hope you do too.  

Peace & Love,
Nikki